Jungle Enthusiast T-Shirts

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

'Forget it. Bioethics doesn't apply to us.'

Lice outbreak at Jungle High (lion with a shaved head).

'I just want you to know that you're a disgrace to every sloth in this jungle and to slothdom in general!'

Rain forest: 'You are here - tomorrow you will be here'

'...and cut the croc stories, I know you're just trying to make this dull trip exciting.'

Jungle Games

"It's the Queen of the Jungle. She wants you to pick up some wildebeest on the way home."

Gorilla in bathroom stall with leaves as toilet roll.

'Your problem is that you don't see the big picture.'

'King of the Jungle', yeah right: I can't even get my kids to listen to me...

Jungle Olympics

'Sure it's expensive. You think saving the rainforest comes cheap?'

'No wonder they're not good tree climbers: Their shoes stop them from using their feet...'

'Say 'AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRAAAAA', Mr Tazan.'

'Bad career moves, number 53'

'OK, I wanna see those trunks move! Left, right, left, right...'

'Mummy, Mummy, this is great: There's a nit-outbreak at school!'

'Make up your mind. Do you want to be rescued or not?'

"It's better for the environment not to shower everyday."

'...All the animals in the jungle are now on the list of endangered species '

tiger strangling snakes

'He was a tough, hard boiled character.'

'You may not be King of the Jungle anymore but you're still my mane man.'

Bob cheats on the true test of manhood.

'I never said I was easy to live with!'

Henry was hoping nobody would notice that he had lost his helmet...

Reality Bites

'Guess what, I got a job tallying bananas.'

Food Chain Letter: 'Wonderful Money Making Opportunities! Send $5 to me and send this letter to 20 other animals lower down the food chain. Those who break this chain will be eaten. Sincerely Yours King & CEO of the Jungle.'

Tarzan calls his next witness.

'I tore down that city block I own and had it replaced with a rainforest. Some of the business owners are a little angry, but my stress has all but gone away.'

'It used to be a jungle out there!'

'Tarzan interviewing for a position as a corporate lawyer.' An interviewer asks, 'When we go against the gorillas, how can we be sure that you won't forget which side you're representing?'

'Eat more roughage?! Took me 20 minutes to run this one down...ain't that rough enough?'