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Ted often though back to those good old days when he was king of just the jungle.

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

'He's not a pet. He's an endangered species.'

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

'We look for a new drug, we find a virus - we look for a new virus, we find a drug...'

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

'Upon entering the rain forest...' 'Thousands of unknown species, and we can fool around with the genes of every one of them.'

"They're comfortable."

'Everybody has to change to compete.'

'It's called 'cause and effect.' I pound this log and Tarzan goes bananas.'

'The forest is so dark and gloomy: It's nice to reach the emergence and get a bit of sunshine...'

'Hey - my dad promised that I'd get a gun.'

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

Yeah, I know what you're talking about: humans have an unhealthy interest in my horn too...

"I disagree — I think humans are funny."

Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

'I don't know about you. But I'm eating my fill before I drag this carcass to the 'king of the beasts'.'

"And I'll have that lightly sedated, please."

"No wonder they've spotted us! Tail down Fred, tail down!"

'We don't want you poking around here any more!'

'You say you were King of the Jungle, but it seems your experience is mainly in savannah grassland...'

'I am so proud: My kids are finally fighting all the time!'

"He didn't do anything, Gregory. This is a zoo"

Danger Slow Sand.

The Tiger Tank that came to Safari Tea.

Jungle Stores.

'Tarzan interviewing for a position as a corporate lawyer.' An interviewer asks, 'When we go against the gorillas, how can we be sure that you won't forget which side you're representing?'

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

"Who wrote this "Law of the Jungle" nonsense? It is highly biased in favour of predators!"