Judgmental Joker Pillows

Peculiar looking group of people talk about how strange they think the other guests at a public ball are

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

That party went well.

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

"Ever wondered about the development of mankind if, just before the big bang, a voice said 'Oops!'"

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

"Isn't it true that the prosecution offered you a bone to testify?"

'You wanted a speedy trial, so I'm sentencing you to a swift kick.'

'Come on inspector, you call this fair?'

You've been found guilty by a jury of your peers -- You're toast fella!

"Repeat after me..."

"Your honor, I intend to put the system on trial."

PARALEGAL, 'Hi -- I'm a paracriminal.'

"'Disability benefits' they said... Not while there are perfectly good jobs as traffic cones to be had!"

Bill Barr kicks Lady Justice

'That's the last frivolous law suit I want to see any lawyer wearing in this court!'

'I'm in for burglarizing a store, but I got a reduced sentence because I only stole sale items.'

"If you can't take it with you, this must be Hell."

'Are you sure you saw my client do it? Let me remind you, it takes one to know one.'

Tee-Hee-Bay - XXXL shoes.

'We find the defendant to be dead meat.'

Mel Hoffman - Attorney TO the stars.

'Either it's a mistake, or this town's gone soft on crime.'

Judge chasing fly with gavel.

Barrister pointing out dozing judge to the jury

"If the crime rate goes up, we'll know it wasn't you."

'For years I thought it was the 'Supremes Court' and decisions were made by three women singing Motown.'

'I got 10 years and my lawyer got 15!'

'officially, I'm on leave, but I'm really just ducking the media.'

'There is something I have been meaning to mention since I was named to the Supreme Court... I've never actually read the Constitution.'