Jovial Jpeg Lover Gifts

"I let go of all my earthly attachments, but there's one I can't seem to shake."

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

"Yeah, my life flashed before my eyes!...OK, it was food - all the food I've ever eaten flashed before my eyes."

"You're going to regret this in the morning."

Family doing circus trick heading to the circus.

Doctor to patient: 'I won't be asking about your three marriages. This isn't an invasive procedure.'

"....'Sickness, health? ... better, worse... richer, poorer?'... how about leaving me some wiggle room!"

Celebration in operating theatre.

'Your smile came in a distant third.'

"Don't worry, I won't hold my age against you."

"Are bringing your new girlfriend to the office party?"

'You said we can grow our own food. So, where's the hot dog seeds.'

The Relentlessly Jovial & Obnoxious Sales-People.

"Watkins would like to know if he can leave a few minutes early...he claims he's dying."

"Wait a minute, that's my bar code" Product Identity Theft

"Well looks like it's time for eye glasses."

Man with Balloon

Enthusiastic man

"Ted wants to bring the fan back into accounting"

'I'll be with you in a minute Carl. Riley's just showing me how to resize some images to Jpeg.'

Do you know what girls want?

"I brake for milk & cookies"

'I'm very impressed with your new butler, Charles. He carries himself well.' (A butler carrying himself in the air).

'And this one's for humor in the line of duty.'

"Doctor! This is not the time for the 'pull my finger' gag!"

"Some advice please... How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

"Look Fred, are you going to play, or are you just going to clown around?"

'Doreen's been all over me to paint the house and Phillip wouldn't stop bugging me for a new trampoline, so...'

10 Items or Less. Express Only. Don't worry --- I plan to pay for them ten at a time.

Does your good modd get on everybody's nerves? Get brought down by a grouch pro an be popular again!

"Time to blow out the candles. Take a deep breath....Ok. Let's try something easier. Take a shallow, raspy breath."

"Really? Mine has pictures of you from the party last night!"