Jovial Fisher Pillows

'I like to give them a sporting chance.'

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

"The trees are laughing at us."

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

Clown Wedding with Rake

'Ben has a new fishing technique - he calls it 'Fish Hawk'.'

'You may well have eaten fresher fish before but not in this restaurant. . .'

Complaints Desk

'Rex here, is just like one of the family.'

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

Death Photobombs a Holiday

Doctor to patient: 'I won't be asking about your three marriages. This isn't an invasive procedure.'

Pie chart of pub conversations

You know what I like about our meetings? There's always more finger pulling than pointing.

'Your smile came in a distant third.'

"Don't worry, I won't hold my age against you."

'Well, the weatherman was wrong again. He said we would have heavy but isolated showers today.'

'I'm not as think as you drunk I am.'

'He's a natural born fisherman.'

"I'm Walter Grimes and I approve this drink."

"I'm doing better. The voices in my head can now access my email."

"I take it you'l like to open joint accounts. . ."

"Look - the FIRST EVER picture of a black hole!! What do you think?"

Nyargh! - 'I swear I will never eat fibre again...' - 'I christen thee 'Titan'.'

"Growing old is not the problem... it's not being rich that's the problem."

"And now for the 'piece de resistance!'"

'As I feared, the X-ray shows that you are crying inside.'

'Let's try again but NO laughing this time!'

"What was Santa thinking calling me Dancer? I think I have two left feet..."

"What a listener. My burden feels lighter already."

"No raise, but the boss did give me a 'God Boy' and a treat."

"That's the secret to a happy marriage. We both love the same things."

Hole drilled in floor. 'That's fixed that.'

'A table near the wine steward, please.'