Jovial Jesters Pillows

Pie chart of pub conversations

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The new piece of the armor of God, "the facemask of fearlessness."

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

Begin this high fiber diet slowly. Too fast and your co-workers may complain of a greenhouse effect.

Growth Charts

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

'The good teen-age mime chooses to study for an exam, while the bad one chooses to steal hubcaps.'

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

"The trees are laughing at us."

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

'If someone farts in the forest and there's no one around to smell it, does it make a stink?'

Richard the Turd

Clown Wedding with Rake

"I'm off, I only popped in for a swift three units."

'I'm SECRET Santa, kid.'

'How am I going to get all this back in the tube?'

"Redcoat is down! Repeat, redcoat is down!"

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

Complaints Desk

Family doing circus trick heading to the circus.

'Rex here, is just like one of the family.'

Death Photobombs a Holiday

Who says religion can't have a sense of humour.

You know what I like about our meetings? There's always more finger pulling than pointing.

'I'm not as think as you drunk I am.'

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

"That's right, Robert. Santa sends us a copy of his naughty and nice list, and we send him our students' grades."

'We, the jury, find the defendant guilty... and his attorney obnoxious.'

Nyargh! - 'I swear I will never eat fibre again...' - 'I christen thee 'Titan'.'

"And now for the 'piece de resistance!'"

Hot Cross Bun

'Wow...you must have had a really bad day, eh, mate?'

"Look - the FIRST EVER picture of a black hole!! What do you think?"

"I'm doing better. The voices in my head can now access my email."