Jovial Early Risers Gifts

Bill's alarm clocks were going off early today.

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

"I know we got early to catch him...but he looks so cute I just can't eat him!"

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

French Early Bird

'It's only 6 AM, but I want to send the kids to Wally's house before his mother sends him over here.'

And if he wants to keep his job, the early bird better get me a coffee, too.

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

Evolution of a coffee drinker.

Have you got your make up on yet?

1,572 Performances.

"Hold on... did you mean to hit Snooze or Jazz?"

'Now that we've moved to Hawaii, I can start trading at 3:30 a.m.--Isn't that great?'

Early Bird Gets the Worm/Night Owl Does the Worm

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

"It's time to wake up!"

'You see, you don't really need a cigarette to wake up in the morning.'

Sleepwalking to work.

'You know what they say Mum: The early bird catches the worm! So I'm sleeping in...'

Pie chart of pub conversations

'Well, I can't find anything in the rule book about it.'

Doctor to patient: 'I won't be asking about your three marriages. This isn't an invasive procedure.'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

'The farmer's kids asked me to wake them early tomorrow: It's Christmas day!'

Young girl asks young boy what time he wakes in the morning

Early Night Club

"Coffee?! After 20 minutes of waiting, I'm FULLY awake without one."

'Your smile came in a distant third.'

Judges alarm clock: 'beep beep, all rise!'

"Hurry, I've been waiting for you."

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