Journey To The Afterlife Gifts

St Peter: 'The bike can stay. You, on the other hand, aren't on the list.'

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"Surgery up here is free!"

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"I thought there would be bacon here."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

"It's true: no more burpees."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

"You are running low on cloud storage space. Please upgrade your account to continue."

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

'Yeah, I know your idea of heaven is to play golf all day, but all we have is shuffleboard!'

'This is way better than a litter box.'

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

'Remember that outfit, Miss Wilson, that you said you wouldn't be seen dead wearing?'

'It's sad in a way -- just when he was declaring victory.'

"You're a physician? Let me ask you about a problem that I've been having."

"I don't want any old ones, I want my own back..."

'So that's why I didn't get that train set? !'.

"Only one of my lives was a bowl of cherries."

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

'Welcome to Heaven. By the way, here's your favorite club you lost on that course 28 years ago.'