Jokers In Scrubs Pillows

'Let's be careful this morning, the patient's wife informed me that he broke a chain-letter recently.'

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

"And I want you to meet Coco, your anesthesiologist."

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

"Let's save a few so we can continue to piss off the neighbors for the next few weeks."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

'I thought my appointment was for a TB screening.'

'Hi, I'm Dr.Jones. Sorry about my little prank, but it saves us a fortune in enemas.'

"What are you trying to tell me, girl? Are you hungry? You’re not hungry? The squirrels are skinny-dipping in the pool? Cats are making a hook rug out of your bed? You dug up Jimmy Hoffa?!" "Mitch liked messing with his dog's head."

'Who's ready for laughter-- the best medicine?!!!'

Celebration in operating theatre.

Doctor Flattened By The ER Rush

'It's just a precaution, the anesthetist can't find his wedding ring.'

"At least you made it into the hallway."

"But he's way more fun than the rubber ducky."

'When did the treadmill replace the rat race?'

"I'm removing the liver.. No, the kidneys... Presure, pressure, what's that blobby thing?"

"And I suppost you've never had a friendly wager with a colleague?"

'Will you stop saying 'try not to get blood all over everything!'.'

"This cabernet sauvignon will have you feeling more like yourself in no time."

'Regarding the surgery you just had - I hope you have a good sense of humour.'

'When the aliens abducted and probed me, they said I was fine. But I'd like a second opinion.'

"On my right is Mr. Darius, who'll fill you in on our corporate counterculture."

"Doctor - can I administer my own anaesthetic?"

'That would be way embarrassing.'

Barrister laughing at the judge's jokes

"Please excuse him...interns always worry patients don't think they're real doctors!"

Gift Suggestions for Post-Diamond Wedding Anniversaries

'I think I'll walk to work today.'

Surgery.

'I wanted a burial service, he wanted cremation, so I decided to compromise and have him clambaked.'

"I'm recommending a transplant. I'm transplanting you to another hospital."

Death Goes For A Jog

Literal Following of Directions: RUN