Joker On Wheels Gifts

'This? This is my husbands mid life crisis sports car. I helped him out naming it!'

Banana Split...

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

Get crazy once in a while

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

Jogging Bottoms

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

'McWit, that's not what's meant by carbo loading.'

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

'How about a nice saloon?'

Bicycle Sidecar.

'The doctor is running a little late this morning; but a couple more laps around the park and he should be back at his desk.'

'George, stop playing with the children.'

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

Unicyclist painting a ceiling.

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

Very drunk professional cyclist

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"I've been telling everyone how athletic you are."

Adult Absence Notes.

Here lies BoBo the Clown

'There are two types of cholesterol - the good type, then the one you've got.'

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

Toilet humour

"Everybody's a comedian. When I asked the clerk if he had this size bolt, he laughed and asked, 'What are you - some kind of nut?'"

Mr. Bubbles was beginning to regret sending his son off to clown college. 'Is that what they teach you, up at that fancy school of yours?!'

False encouragement.

No infrastructure problem here