Jesus Aficionado Gifts

Two men in T-shirts, one shirt says Jesus loves me, the other Jesus loves me more.

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"When are they going to change the 'feature'?"

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

Nun Fight.

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

Where 'Pastor'-ized Milk Comes From...

"They're not Levi Strauss - they're not Levi Tate."

Designer Kangaroo Pocket

Santa Claus You Are Welcome.

"It's just one bad review and we all know who wrote it."

"Then it's agreed. Judgment Day, whenever it comes, will fall on a Thursday, so that they'll get the long weekend."

'Looks like somebody needs to lay off of the authentic angel food cake!'

"That's our new church mascot."

'It's not much of a soap opera with just that Adam guy.'

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

"You run into a window, too?"

The Suite Hereafter

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

'The good stuff is here, under the counter.'

"I don't want any old ones, I want my own back..."

'How long has it been shaking like a bowl full of jelly when you laugh?'

'Look Chaucer, there goes that rotten plagiarist Shakespeare again!'

"Remember that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven

A few post-Christmas options for Santa.

'This new jester doth appeal to me.'

"So what do you do for a living?"

"They weren't kidding when they said a women's work is never done!"

"I can never remember if it's smite or smote."

Jester

Pope Benedict 16th.