Jam Connoisseur T-Shirts

"The Toast Whisperer"

'Niche market'

'Well, I'd say this calls for a toast!'

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

Scarpia's Palace

Bobbies library of jeans

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

Man frozen in portrait pose.

"We interrupt this advertisement to bring you another advertisement that has just been rushed to the studio."

Moliere

Musical Pipe

Charles Dickens.

Preserved

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

Bleak House

"And now a word from our sponsors...ratings."

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

A railway station covered in advertising.

'We have the ideas for product placement and now all we need is the script.'

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

'I want a campaign that will fol some of the people some of the time and all of the people all of the time.'

The 'I'm Almost Finished With War And Peace' Bookmark

Lionel Hampton and Chuck Berry

Cottage Industry

"As you know our marketing budget is small. We need to make a really bad commercial and hope it goes viral!"

Back to the '80s: Pumping up the jam.