Jam Connoisseur T-Shirts

"The Toast Whisperer"

'Niche market'

'Well, I'd say this calls for a toast!'

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

Bobbies library of jeans

Tarzan has gone into advertising. He's king of the jingle now.

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

Scarpia's Palace

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

B.B. King

"We interrupt this advertisement to bring you another advertisement that has just been rushed to the studio."

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Moliere

Musical Pipe

C Day Lewis.

Dave Brubeck

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

Charles Dickens.

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

Preserved

Bleak House

"And now a word from our sponsors...ratings."

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

At Mary Higgins Clark's book club.

A railway station covered in advertising.

"It turns out my milk is actually aging cream...so, I use it to remove all those ugly age spots."

Elvis impersonator, managed by Col. Parker's nephew, Eddie.

'We have the ideas for product placement and now all we need is the script.'

"Rapunzel! Rapunzel! Your shampoo delivery is here!"

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

'I want a campaign that will fol some of the people some of the time and all of the people all of the time.'

The 'I'm Almost Finished With War And Peace' Bookmark

Lionel Hampton and Chuck Berry

Apricot flavoured traffic 'jam'...on toast.