Jailbird Gamer Pillows

'Cards? Sure -- I've got some time to kill.'

"White Collar Prison"

'Where did I bury the loot? -- I thought you buried the loot!'

Exhibition for Prisoners

"Regards from the kids, grandma, mom and pop, uncle Fred , Aunt Theresa and cousins Harvey, Flo and Niki. They all want to know where you hid the loot."

'My lawyer will get us out of here. This is a clear breach of human rights.'

'My biggest mistake was to make a 'death-bed confession'... then I made a full recovery!'

'Smooth move -- Now we're in REAL trouble!'

"I'm the first one in my family to do time."

"Psst. Pass it on. Tonight's the break!..."

'Sure I do bad things, but I do them in moderation.'

'Sweetheart, your calls are slowing my early release.'

''Where do you see yourself in five years'? That's a stupid question! You know darn well I'll be finishing 5-years of a 25-year sentence!'

"Miss Robins, get me a ladder and a hacksaw, if you will, please."

"The reason I never get any visitors is because all my family and friends are in here!"

'Hey kid, what are you in for?'

'I made good money - until they added colour to the twenty dollar bills.'

Love in prison.

'It was sort of like a penalty for early withdrawal. The bank hadn't opened yet.'

'Look on the bright side -- we could still be in the MARKET.'

'MY doctor says I don't get out enough!'

"You guys go ahead—I'm an inside cat."

'Your mother reckons you look like your baby photos now without your dandruff, dear.'

'It's best if you take it one day at a time.'

"The bad news is Lady Sybil has died in childbirth. On the other hand, Bates is back home and Tom's sticking around to help run the estate."

'Forget about it, we all try it when we arrive here, but it's a concrete floor...'

"Cancel all hunger strikes."

Prisoner

"I believe thr guv'nor used to own a boarding house in Blackpool."

'So what's your recommendation? I suggest a tunnel.'