Jaded Jester Pillows

I was found guilty, eight of the jury were my ex-wives.

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"We're following Carrot Top."

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

"It's great to see Biff; Socksie the cat is out of the bag..."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"It probably got lost in the voice mail."

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

"The trees are laughing at us."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

Stepping on clown's shoe...

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"#notguilty."

'Natalie, would you please bring me the buzzword du jour?'

Yawning barristers in court

Dept. for Obfuscation - Out for periodic diurnal replenishment of nutritive substances.

A baby in court

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

The Scones-Monkey Trial. I, Judge Sadie, am prepared to rule. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Intelligent design versus evolution. Borrrinnng. That is my legal finding. Appeal. Will all bipeds please rise.

"Dave here, is a lawyer. But don't be too impressed, he only specialises in petty crime."

Clown Wedding with Rake