Jack-o'-lantern Connoisseur Gifts

Punkins

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

'Awesome mummy costume!' 'I'm a pirate! Some kids just TPed me...'

Scary stuff

Punkins

Classic Emojis for sale.

Happy Halloween. Something's different about her. It's boo!-tox. Every Halloween its the same thing. They take candy off the house and never come to the door. That careless jerk almost trampled me! What was it? The "Heedless" Horseman! I know it's just toilet paper, but as a mummy it still gives me the creeps!

"This way I don't have to lug around that big bag."

"It was a botched surgery."

Scratchy carves out another masterpiece.

Alien Spaceship Crashes - On Halloween. House owner think he is trick or treating.

"In my previous life I was arugula."

'With our romantic candlelight dinner, I'm obligated to include a safe-sex warning.'

Year of the Rat

"With Tia Carmen's chickens, we'll get twice as much candy!"

'Arghhh! He's got no face!'

"OK, I've emptied my mind and cleared my head...what now?"

"Lost all track fo time with you. 93 unread messages!"

"Your candle has gone out."

'I called the electric company and told them not to hurry to restore power.'

"You're lucky you don't get carved this time of year."

'Shhhhh...He's preparing for the holiday season.'

"We're running late. Just pick a facial expression already."

Chiantis In Translation

"Too soon?"

"Bye. Sorry we didn't have any worms."

"When's the last time you flossed?"

"I'm afraid I've got some bad news."

A heifer you can't refuse,...

"Oh how cute, a little flight crew! Here's some trash."

"Try nibblin' through that, you little tree rat!"

'Take a piece of candy and a tax form. The treat is a gratuity and therefore reportable income.'

"How about if I just buy you fifteen dollars worth of candy?"

'We should do this more often, not just when the power goes out!'

"Trade you my catnip mouse for your milkbones?"