Jab Maestro Pillows

Fighting Covid

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy'. You in?"

Violin Practise

How to identify the alarming mood swings of male menopause.

"... and come out fighting, boys."

"Holy hell. I should not have based my whole personality around this..."

Computer Music

"Home school marching band"

An Audio Technician's Pocket Knife

'Where are the kids?'

'You didn't practice last night,did you?'

Nest building

Arnold's clone refuses to workout: 'You're a huge disappointment, dude.'

Ray Price, Willie Nelson, Merle Haggard

Elwood 'I Can Fix This Myself' McGrunzen

My rebounding blue chips are chipping my blues away...

Musical Prodigy

'I will now play a selection of digital audio files I downloaded today.'

'I'll just grab a coffee...'

"I gave him 'the old one two' just like you told me to. But then he gave me 'the old three four'."

Moses conducts the Red Sea orchestra.

'Hup, two, three, four! Hup, two, three, four!'

A janitor stomps on, mops up and bottles some grapes to make "Truly Affordable Beaujolais".

"Let's make this our last celebrity cruise."

'Managers karaoke night'

'I play heavy metal.'

'I know Pasteur didn't work under these conditions, but Pasteur didn't have fifty companies trying to steal his trade secrets.'

We are on the move. . .

A bulge of bodybuilders

"See, I told you it would hurt me as much as it would hurt you."

"I must be getting good, 'cause my dad told to go play for the neighbors!"

'The thing I liked best about being an amateur is that the other guy was an amateur too!'

'Keep on jabbing kid, with your lousy punch, it's the only chance you got!'

"Technically I have managed to get that big old sofa out the door..."