Italian Food Devotee T-Shirts

"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."

Tartine

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

Under pressure.

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"Deep-dish pizza calls for deep-glass beer."

Pasta

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

I love Cannelloni

Panettone

'If I order pasta and she orders antipasta, did we really order anything?'

The Complete Spaghetti Dinner.

"Fangul." Italian sausage.

'I don't know how much more of this I can take!'

'Do you call this spaghetti'

'Your pizza will be out in a few minutes. Tony's looking for a ladder to get it off the ceiling.'

'Waiter, I think my wife's calamari is underdone.'

'Well you asked for Al dente.'

Italian Style Fish 'n' Chips

'We've run out of Parmesan cheese.' Food in pasta.

Spaghetti Road

"No matter how much gelato, pizza and tiramisu I eat, I gain weight. This Mediterranean diet just isn't working."

'I WARNED you we had the largest slice in town!'

'The town where they make Parmesan cheese is very well to do. In fact, I hear it's a grated community.'

"And not only do I make my own pizza sauce, I have a special way of crushing the tomatoes!"

'I have a thing about Italian food-my wife has a thing about Italian waiters !'

The art of pizza

'I told you I only cook with my mother's Italian spices. She just left Naples and should be here with them in about eight hours.'

"When a man is tired of pasta, sir, he is tired of life. Dr. Johnson."

"We'd like bruschetta, and we'd like it pronounced correctly."

"At ease!"

"Our Fettuccine is eaten with spoon and fork. Angle Hair gets a comb and scissors."

"Pizza for one - and your extra large is on the way."

"Fusilli, you crazy bastard! How are you?"

"So, our holiday was cancelled but at least our tastebuds can still go to Italy."