It Security Specialists Pillows

"You don't need to come in for any more check-ups . . . we can get most of your personal information off Facebook."

'With government cyber snooping, we must communicate through channels no one would ever suspect...the postal service.'

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

'I've decided to centralize my operations. Everything will be in my ipad.'

21st century water cooler conversations.

Out and In.

"Sorry, we've found an app that's better at being you than you!"

The Googler

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

'Can our software do that?'

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

"Uh-oh...it's starting to delegate work to me."

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

'Help! I'm wired and I can't get up!'

"My hackers just collapsed your country's economy."

"Why do you need so many computers?" "One for billing, one for stock control, one for human resources, one for financial management..."

'Calling Tech Support does NOT count as one of my wishes!'

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

Gadget geek.

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

"Smaller, more powerful chips allow me to have a smaller head."