Ironically Stranded Gifts

'Luckily, my iPod contains a set of 10 songs I'd like to listen to if I were stranded on an island.'

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

"I said isn't it great to get away from it all."

Santa Claus delivers present to man stranded on desert island.

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

Castaway harnessing electricity.

'Look at the bright side. Think of our mutual funds going up, up, up!'

Sex and violence/hell and brimstone.

Death Takes A Time-Share

"We'll see you soon, kids! Your mother and I have won a romantic cruise for two on some man's huge ark."

'I sure hope you're a marriage counselor.'

'Not bad, what about the Christmas Cards?'

'It'll be a working vacation.'

"Fiji wants to protect democracy by not holding elections..."

Hiker and the Rodents.

Notice on desert island - sand for sale

"We were all given motivational videos at work today. All it shows is our boss shouting and sacking people."

Man stranded on island selling coconuts. Advertises same location 14 years.

'Coconut? -- You seriously expect me to bite on coconut?'

'The tide goes out along way, doesn't it?'

'Don't worry. I have no intention of drinking the water.'

Southwest Hampton

'Maybe now you'll admit that we're lost!?'

'You're trying to hail a taxi?... Are you insane? You'll never get one at this time of day!'

Sign pointing to the beach and in the direction of mobile phones.

"I'd say my number-one issue is getting off the island, and then, after that, probably health care."

'LAND!'

Castaway stranded on a desert island with only one coconut palm for survival finds a box of coconuts

"I'm sorry, but I believe I'm now way out of your network."

'Okay, this time I've added - "How do you rate this message?" with one to five stars.'

"They didn't tell us this blues cruise actually gives you the blues."

"Tabarnak!"

'No need for that. I owe taxes, they'll find us!'

desert island. Referee tosses coin for football game with no players

"You have no new messages."