Ironic Spending Gifts

"How much were you thinking of spending?"

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

'...But the good news is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'

"We just can't justify the expense of cheese, let alone the upkeep of the maze."

"Well - that's enough from me, I shall now introduce our Head of Pensions..."

"Willis has kindly agreed to sum up our current financial position."

'You don't know how lucky you are. My mortgage is worth more than my house.'

I spent it all under the silly notion that it was all mine.

'You must know my kids...they spend like there's no tomorrow.'

"How can we cut costs on Mars vehicles?"

'Who's the wise guy?'

"It might sound silly, but I don't think this job is good for my diet."

"Well, that's not a good market indicator."

"It would appear that our 'rainy day investment fund' hasn't even yielded enough to buy us an umbrella each."

'Ooops, wrong door!'

"He's all the stimulus I need."

'We can't increase taxes on the rich - the rich are the ones who made America what it is today - and you only hope...someday...'

80 Million Euros for a football player.

"I understand Senator Quigley was really counting on that raise."

Your Flexible Fiend.

"I'm still spending a lot of money, but I'm spending it ironically."

Last minute gift ideas

'How much exactly is a chinese takeaway?'

First Church of Fiscal Morality: The Meek Shall Inherit The National Debt!

'Yes, they do have magnetic strips, but no, iron supplements don't cause you to be attracted to credit cards.'

He knew it. She was cheating on him again. Buying brand-name products and putting them in bulk containers. You know, just to appear thrifty.

Gas prices

'That lunch didn't agree with me - it wasn't tax deductable.'

"That's it then, they're unfashionable now I want to buy them"

"I tried kicking the economic crisis down the road, and it kicked me back!"

'In appreciation of his thirty years as head galley slave, Narvak receives his retirement gift'

"You can have the cherry - I'm on a diet."

The new ATMs.

Pound sign in a stained glass window of a church.