Ironic Chore Avoider Pillows

It's Your Turn to Do the Dishes Tonight!

A man washing a mascot costume

Extreme Sisyphus

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

The four housemen of procrastination

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

"Harold! Don't forget to get the eggs!"

'If you want to get some exercise, carry this out to the garbage.'

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

"...I love the smell of an uncut lawn."

"It's your turn to shovel the perch."

"Oh, just cellaring. You?"

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."

"Okay, everyone...time to clean up the house. Gracie, what job do you want?"

"Sorry Mrs. Tate. There's no cure for Not-Taking-Out-The-Garbage-Itis."

Kid sweeps dirt under his junk on the floor.

'She's spring cleaning and you?'

Why do chicks dig vampires? They're forbidden, immortal. They have unimaginable strength. They visit at night, bringing wisdom and sensuality. And if they don't take out the trash or mow the lawn you can burn them to death with sunlight! Yikes. They can get housework done while I sleep.

'It's your night to catch dinner.'

"Don't you dare touch that snooze button!"

"They don't look like the tools you'll need to put the kitchen shelves up with!"

"Uh, it's the funniest thing honey... None of my power tools seem to work! I guess those projects will have to wait..."

"We have a lot in common. We both hate homework, vegetables, bedtime, chores, long car trips. . ."

'Got'a be done I s'pose.'

'Well, you told me not to walk through the kitchen in muddy boots!'

'I know you're sensitive, Wally, but I only asked you to help wash the dishes!'

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

Risks for the heart patient Unloading the Dishwasher "Sorry? No can do." Answering the Land Line R-R-RING! R-R-R-RING! N-nope R-R-RING!!! Doing Taxes "Doc said I should take it easy." Any Car-Related Errand "The old ticker."

"May, I don't care how wet the toilet seat gets, I turned the water off last time."

"It's my "To-Do" list if I ever get the energy..."

"Unfortunately, my wife knows me like a book. She's a librarian."

"The cat cleaned the birdcage."

"What is the first item on the to do list?"