Investing In Real Estate Gifts

"Yes, it's nice, but it's lost twenty per-cent of its value in the past year."

Hey, I told you not to buy that timeshare.

"The high price is due to the great view of the beach."

"To be honest, I'd be stupid not to take advantage of the market."

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

'Now that I have your attention...'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"Stock options for your thoughts."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

The day the stock market went UP.

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

Hollywood Sign Developers

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

Profit

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

"Third quarter numbers were good after we cut our global workforce three to two."

Today we'll see some misused or misunderstood financial and economic terms. It's said inflation can hurt the economy. But it's absolutely in the tire business. I bought this warm puffy jacket with cash. A down payment. We like beer and coffee. Our most valuable liquid assets. In a monopoly breakup, the race car would to go one person and the dog to another. And when I become either a buyer or a seller. He's shorting the market!

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'