Introvert Friend Pillows

'My best and most beloved friend - thanks so much for coming!'

"It's not the persistent lack of sunlight or freezing temperatures that bother me - it's the crowds I can't stand."

"Too crowded. Let's go."

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

Nerd tryouts.

Self-Isolating. Do Not Disturb (Except For Food).

Life on Earth - The original chat room.

It's not considered drinking alone if the cat is at home.

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

She required plenty of personal space.

'How come we never get invited to 'come as you are' parties?'

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

'A quick pint or a quiet drink?'

'Not only do we have no natural enemies we have no natural friends.'

'Mind if I join you?'

'Welcome to the first meeting of the Shy Men Club.'

Meet The Author's Wife. The author is too surly to talk.

Brown Non-Recluse Spider

'You can social network me behind my ears if you like.'

Honestly, I don't know why I even bring Harold to parties.

'Before you go, introduce yourself, so that I know who you were...'

Big Talk/Small Talk.

"The joy of the house to myself"

"I don't want to go back to school; other people are my kryptonite."

"I'm more of an 'I like to watch' dog."

"I have to cancel our plans. I feel a headache coming on."

People I've Met At Parties Whose Names I've Forgotten

Introverted Chair

"It's from the Hendersons. They want us to come over this weekend."

'You cant do anything these days without someone suspecting your motives. . . there is only one way out. . . inaction.'

"I work from home because I can’t stand the sight of idiots." "Is that why you got rid of all our mirrors?"

'You ought to get out more according to experts.'

'Boy, look at his personal space!'

"Are you still mad at me?" "Mentally I'm storming off right now."