Intimacy Avoider Gifts

"I think you're using lawnmower repair to avoid intimacy."

The Amazing Man-Spider

"...Our extensive in house survey found that 82% of you think in house surveys are a waste of time."

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

"It's essential I go to work to avoid being with my family."

Pyjama party

"There appears to be a direct correlation between fewer meetings and higher productivity."

"We're going to see my family. There's an extra twenty in it for you if we never get there."

Exposed Intimacy Safety Vulnerability Hidden Enmity

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

"What flower says you're sorry without admitting wrongdoing?"

"If someone hugs me my first day back, I'm going to just break into pieces."

Nervous at a party.

Romantic Coffee Dates

Election Cancelling Headphones

"A see through nighty? God who'd want to see you through that?"

Snoozed when I should have schmoozed.

List of things to do today. Make list of things to do tomorrow.

"Just this once, can we not talk about news or politics or money or family or relationships or children or friends or sex or religion or sports or culture or real estate or the past or the future?"

'I'd like to request flexible working to avoid my family.'

"We've been standing here talking about how to pitch to the batter for way too long, haven't we?"

Businessman wonders why he called a meeting.

'Is he expecting you?'

"I invited a few friends over. Don’t worry – you can still be miserable."

"Not having to go into the office every day has really cut back on pointless meetings..."

'Wilcox! Do come in...I'm just leaving!'

Desperate employees escape through bosses high-rise window. 'Hurry! His meeting is almost over!'

Beware... the Piñata of Adulthood

Herman likes to stay in his comfort zone.

'How To Say No To Sales People'.

"I too want companionship, intimacy, someone to grow old with, but not 24/7."

'Been coming here for years and never bumped into anyone who knows me . . . weird!'

"We came early to avoid the conga line."

"Basically, we have two options: #1: Do what I want or #2: Endure an excruciatingly dull presentation..."

'I hate networking.'