Interview Preppers Pillows

"I'm sorry, I always fall to pieces at interviews."

'University of Xylongatnyefxodyl - never heard of it!'

"Last question. Where do you see yourself thirty seconds from now?"

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

'The golden eggs are great... but I need you to lay a golden parachute.'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

"I'm long term unemployed because jerks like you won't hire me!"

"You have a killer resume, Phil, but unfortunately, we have all the dead wood we need right now."

S.O.S. vaccine

Prepper Dog

Holiday Gifts 2020

'You've got swine flu and I think it's begun to mutate.'

"I felt like 'data analyst' sounded better than 'good guesser'."

"I told you they had a tough interview process here."

Trick or Treatment.

'It's the worst I've seen in this area. Lots of chicken pox going around.'

"This isn't just about the wolf anymore, is it?"

Climate Change Contingency House

"It would be unwise to attend an interview without doing any preparation in advance.

"As you can see, hands are about to hit peak dryness, so we're predicting record lotion sales for next quarter."

'You don't have much of a work history, do you, Mr. Laren?'

Hazmat suit

". . .And are you a good listener?"

Safe harbour

"So, let me get this right. All the job involves is running around a track as fast as I can?"

"You say your biggest faults are working too hard and blind loyalty to your employer. What do you take me for… An idiot?"

"Ned is getting ready for the oceans to rise."

Chicken Noodle sold out.

Sourdough starter. Mask-making supplies. Everything else

"So, where do you see yourself in ten minutes?"

'I want to be ready when the sea level rises!'

'I see by your resume that you're full of it.'