Interview Geek Pillows

"Do you have any other strengths?"

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

Early cyborg.

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

Do you have any other skills?

'And I see you've listed opposable thumbs as your greatest asset...'

'Don't start timing me yet! This staple won't come out!'

"I'm looking for a 'yes man' who can say 'no' without sounding negative"

'Your resume and interview were so bad, not only did you not get the job, I'm having you arrested as well.'

Twitter censorship

"According to your resume, you've done just about everything except ever having a job."

"So, you want to work at our firm, Eh?"

And I like to call this my 'dance of the enhanced PEP at alternative firms'.

"So what makes you think you're the man for the job?"

"Reports that AI is planning a world takeover are greatly exaggerated."

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

"You say you’re currently holding down 3 jobs...very impressive."

Help wanted. Various positions available.

'You're on the shortlist. It's between you and the bloke who's going to get the job.'

Birds on a wire, "Bernie?...Oh he's gone cable!"

'The position carries no salary, just healthcare coverage.'

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

'He will observe your text now...'

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

The end is near

'I'm sorry, but you have a very impressive resume, and at this company, we find competence threatening.'

'You don't want the job, do you?'

"And where do you see your mustache in five years?"

'I see you have extensive experience eating, sleeping, and mating. That puts you two steps ahead of all the college graduates who have applied.'