Interstellar Ponderer Gifts

"It's always about YOU."

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

'But what is the universe for?'

God Sneezes Out Creation

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

The Origins of Everything

"What's your favorite planet, Randy?" "There is only one answer, little buddy. There is only one planet full of lush, green forests and beautiful, windswept ocean vista... all of which are natural aphrodisiacs that inspire lovers, philosophers and poets." "You know, Pandora is not a real planet." "I'm talking about Earth, you... Do you ever go outside?"

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

"Could you tilt the Earth just a bit more away from the light?"

"It's scary that humans are our benchmark for intelligent life in the universe."

"Ever wondered about the development of mankind if, just before the big bang, a voice said 'Oops!'"

NASA, 'I thought I smelled oxygen!'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

"If the universe is expanding, that's all the more reason to get back to the city."

"Shall we put it in play?"

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

"I don't see HIS name on it."

Astronaut stumbles upon a weird space anomaly.

'Scientists agree the universe is expanding - Mendenhall is trying to find out where the financing is coming from.'

'Remember when the authorities were notified when we were spotted? Now nobody cares. They think we're drones.'

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

"Anyway, it turned out that god was a ruddy algorithm after all!"

'Who was there to hear the Big Bang?'

'Harnessing the Black Hole.'

'Let me know when they figure out that it isn't flat.'

Jesus wept

"This just in; the Sun has exploded. Further developments in eight minutes."

"If the universe is expanding by 3 trillion cubic light years per second, why can't I find an apartment?"

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!