Internet Language Master Gifts

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

Campaign for Plain English

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

WTF?

'How do you stop a fish from smelling?'

'You're texting? Wait--'

New Curriculum Timetable - All in Cantonese.

'Charles is a linguist. He speaks three language...golf, baseball and football.'

Wilfried Zaha

'Hey! Did you suddenly forget English? Get in here!'

"FISH ON"

'Cosa vuol significare 'Spaghetti Western'?'

"He spent all morning trying to teach me my own name."

'Yes, a winky face is correct... But in ancient times, the semicolon was actually used to separate archaic written devices known as 'complete sentences.''

Welcome to Silicon Valley...the user friendly place.

"You sure know how to talk to sales clerks!"

"OMG! The PDA was 2 much. I was lol. . . Oh, sorry Daddy, I'm just so use to texting!"

'Why am I feeling like this..?'

Communikations Semminar.

"It's just a dinner table conversation. Must you refer to it as 'Talking Off-line'."

"So, you've got butterflies in your stomach, a bug in your ear and a bee in your bonnet. Any other complaints?"

A teacher introduces the new student to the class - he's an alien - 'Good evening class, this is Zork and he will be joining us until he learns enough English to conquer the Earth...'

Cliche Workshop, "Who wants to get the ball rolling?"

Computer shows code violation to wierd user.

Wordplay: Amphibious

The shining light of open-source software.

'You ask him to sing. I don't speak Italian.'

'The following speaker was scheduled to give his talk last week, but needed more time to prepare his impromptu speech.'

You read the instructions upside down.

"Why study Latin? I guess so we'll know what Super Bowl game we're watching."

'I don't like this predictive text.'