Interior Decor Enthusiasts Pillows

'There's no way he painted this ceiling mural by himself.'

"Yup, looks like your bookcase is full. You might want to start thinking about getting a new one."

"He found some Martha Stewart magazines."

Walking a dog on a treadmill.

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"You're welcome."

"The knights of the round accent table"

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"Pillows for sleeping on are downstairs. These are all for screaming into."

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

"How much?! Blimey, to get my money's worth, I'd need to use it EVERY WEEK!"

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

Lay-Z-Family Recliner

"If it's got my ass on it, it's befitting of royalty."

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

James decided to stay in that night.

"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."

Unknowingly, with one swish of his blood soaked mammoth tail he was inflicting pain and suffering on billions of unborn people. Home decorating had been invented.

"The artist-in-residence is struggling a bit, but other than that we're fine."

Posh Easter Egg

"I'm ready to go whenever you're through fussing with tablescapes."

King Madras

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

'Oh, honey, what a lovely house... We'll place the couch here, the cupboard there and my psychiatrist right here!'

'Yes,I did bag him from a treestand.How did you guess?'

Has socks and foot stools of every kind sale.

"We need to talk."

Cat being licked by plant.

"The mirrors really do make this apartment look bigger."

Staycation Photos

'Happens every year - I can never remember where I put the tree decorations.'

"Sir, there are no waitresses or menus — this is Crate & Barrel."

Man who has called of his engagement because his fiancée did not match his furniture.