Intelligence Whisperer Prints

Your IQ is 176, Peel. - 'Is that high?' - 'That's higher than Stephen Hawking.' - 'Wow!' - 'Maybe you'll be a great physicist one day.' - 'Will I shrivel, too?' -

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

"Do you swear to calm the jittery financial markets, all the jittery financial markets and nothing but the jittery financial markets, so help you God?"

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

'Can you loan me *** till pay day?'

Computer help.

"Saving Lois Lane a dozen times doesn't mean you can claim her as a dependent on your taxes."

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

Two computers are having a conversation, but stop when their owner enters the room.

'In other words, statistics prove that statisticians aren't always right.'

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

'Tell me more about your programmer.'

'Decoding is often 1, 14, 20, 9, 3, 12, 9, 13, 1, 3, 20, 9, 3.'

"Finally, a co-worker who CAN handle Big data!"

'The computer can talk to terminals all over the country. Bentley thinks it's talking about him.'

Computer whisperer.

we wanted to get rid of all the 'superbugs' but they were the only one's who understood the new it system

'I'm sorry, but it's suffering from a terminal disease.'

When psychiatrists do self analysis.

Caterpillar Paranoia

WWW.World.com

Cellular Plan

The fax machine had stopped and they did not know why.

'It's my job to be nosy!'

Happiness is a warm warm iPad.

"Shoot it? Shoot it? I don't even know which end of the darn thing to aim at it!"

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

You will do as I command...'It had a power surge.'

'Excellent! Our tests confirm that the average shareholder falls asleep by page 9 of the 10-K. Place the notice of the IRS audit on page 10.'

"Sorry, honey, I can't talk now. I'm in the midst of some very intense negotiations with Bill Gates on the electronic rights to you and the kids."

Where history's best ideas happen.