Insurance Pundit Gifts

'I am worried that if people start paying for their cancer treatments then they wont be able to afford to pay us...'

Hate Platforms

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

'You know the economy's in trouble when the Forbes 400 list of wealthiest Americans only has 350 names on it.'

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

'I'm afraid the cuts are beginning to bite!'

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

New company policy...next time you miss a meeting I need a note from a doctor or a subpoena from a judge.

'I'm sorry. It looks like your insurance company doesn't cover pre-existing life.'

"Our government is proud announce a whopping 1% GDP growth at the small cost of climate change nearly wiping our indigenous tribes out."

Trump Will Protect Obama's Legacy

'I knew this was a bad place to work when I saw that they call the company handbook 'the Owner's Manual.''

Early Attempt at Quantitative Easing.

"Hear ye! Hear ye! Look, having nuclear - my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at M.I.T. - good genes, very good genes, O.K., very smart. . ."

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated

'Your cat scan looks fine, your pet scan looks fine, your MRI looks fine, but your insurance reimbursement doesn't look fine.'

Lemonade - $500 A Glass! 'Yes, my prices high, but how else am I supposed to buy a Boulevart M109R? Certainly not on my allowance.'

Vote: Have your photo ID ready!

We can't call the doctor, we can't call the nurse, we have to call the lady with the alligator purse.

"Fact amnesty"

Invade/Fail/Deny

'Make a patriotic decision. Do you want your son to live in a public health insurance tyranny or do you want to let him die as a free American who doesn't have the money to pay for medical treatment?'

Words that can result in employee litigation box.

Johnson allows the Delta variant to run wild in Britain

Bank P45's - 'Cashier number 5 please.'

Single Prayer Health Insurance

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

"The Nominees"

"I liked it better when it was 'don't ask, don't tell the New York Times'."

Davos.

"But but ... if we remove all the additives there'll be nothing left!"

All-Purpose Obamatoon

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'