Instant Gratification Aficionado Gifts

"We texted you for cookies about 10 minutes ago. We don't like to be kept waiting Amber."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"To keep prices down, we require you to cook your own food, wait in yourselves and wash your dishes."

In Case of Emergency: Dark Chocolate

'We will conduct the background check. Our fortune, Madame Zula, will conduct a complimentary future check.'

"I think my Harry must be practicing some sort of Tantric fishing. He'll be at it for hours and not catch a thing."

"I just dialed 1-800-BAGUETTE."

'Maturity: the instant-degratification phase of life.'

"During Lent we must share with poor children what we have in abundance."

Instant Gratification service desk (with a long queue and delay)

"By the time I've read all the nutrition and ingredients information I've lost my appetite!"

Your Sculpture while you wait.

Fine candies: Healthy eating is our no. '6' concern.

"I always choose immediate gratification over vague rewards at some unspecified time in the future."

"I've heard of instant Karma, but I didn't know there was a microwavable version."

When Mrs Murray said you should vary your diet I don't think she meant to just try all 16 flavours of POT NOODLES.

'All you're ever interested in are get-rich-quick schemes. What's your hurry?'

"Welcome to the Department of Delayed Gratification. Take a number."

"Someone told me that it might be 'World stuff your face full of chocolate day'."

"...And a 'Death by Chocolate' for Madame..."

"When the President said each of us should ask 'What can I do for myself?' - Well, I just hopped in a cab and went right over to Saks."

"Find my items... scan my items... pay for my items... bag my items..."

'I'm not hungry.' - 'How's the fasting going?' - 'Not good. I can't stop thinking about food.' - Why are you looking at me funny?' - 'Oh, this isn't good.'

Who needs a TV? We connect the cable directly to your brain!

Bar Bar

'Is the seven year flowering cactus in bud yet?'

The Recline & Fall of Western Civilization.

'I'm afraid medical science really doesn't know very much about 'the munchies.''

'These home brew kits are great... I reckon they'd taste even better if I were to give them a chance to ferment!'

Man pulls on cord which leads to 'Instant Gratification'.

Al by Jud Johnson

Convenience food: '...these days you can get your vegetables this way.'

Life In The fast Lane: '24 hours without food is a long, long time...'

"Young people these days are used to INSTANT feedback..."