Inflight Economist Gifts

'I'm sorry, sir, but there is a 25 surcharge to use the lavatory,'

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

'...And you're always complaining about the government's international trade agreements'

'Voodoo economics was bad enough, but this voodoo foreign policy....'

"Italy's national debt runs into trillions. How do you repossess a country?"

'The people who've been running our economy say we don't have to worry about global warming.'

Win-win. Whenever I hear that from you, I want to hide under the counter. New research shows the only proven way to prolong life is caloric restriction. Eat less, live longer. Introducing our new breakfast meal plan: The Fountain of Youth. You get half a muffin and half a glass of water. Sounds meager. Exactly. That's why we're charging $16. But a full muffin only costs $4. And it won't prolong your life. Can you even put a price on immortality? How much should we charge for an empty plate of ai

"Honey, come quick! I think I just bought Greece on Ebay!"

The High School of Music and Art and Economics

'I invest in emerging markets.'

A Double-Dip Recession with Sprinkles

Santa using the stock exchange to keep track of stocks and bonds being good or bad as well as going up or down

Economic

"Harold finds painting very therapeutic."

Good Things About the Iraq War

'Times are hard so these will have to be presents for Christmas and birthday combined!'

'The global economy is fragile and mysterious, folks... kind of like Tinkerbell in 'Peter Pan.' When people stopped believing in the magic, Tinkerbell almost died. So it's up to us to invent a better supernatural creature to believe in!'

"I'd like to explore the futures market."

'Sorry sir, the 'No Steak and Lobster Jokes' sign just came on.'

"...and then the heroic young investor managed to capture the evil high interest rate monster and wrestled him down until he was a mere 5.25%!"

"Now that we've received our stimulus checks I think I'll head down town and riot."

Covid Relief

"Leading economic indicators tell me I should go shopping."

'We'll know if capitalism is in real trouble if the rich stop getting richer.'

Flat tax

Ok, I've set you up with an offshore back account, so you can hide your valuables for use after the oncoming apocalypse. You're too kind, sir. Where is it? Caymans? Switzerland? That's amateur stuff. The economy's increasingly global. When America goes down, it could take the Swiss and Cayman economies down with it. Then where – To open your account, I'll need your passport, tax returns, and a map of your genome. Bank of Deneb Prime. Trump turned me on to it.

'In life I was scorned for worshipping the Almighty Dollar.'

"My flight’s been delayed for the third time—whom do I punch in the face for that?"

Dollar sign balloon.

Economic theory office with two boxes on desk - 'the rich get richer' and 'the poor get poorer'.

Man weighing a pound sign against Great Britain.

'Atmospheric, conditions are right for a 'trickle-down', which will bring relief to impoverished areas!'

Huge lady lady sitting down on a crowded bus

"I invited my friends over so we can see how much your generation is leaving us to pay off!"

I've been all over the galaxy, and they have the strangest economic system I've ever seen!