Infinity Ponderer T-Shirts

'Yes, it is.' - 'No, it isn't.' - 'It is.' - 'It isn't.' - 'Is to a million.' - 'Isn't to a million plus one.' - 'Is to infinity!' - 'Isn't to infinity plus one.' - 'Duh - that's still infinity.' - 'Isn't to infinity plus two - ha!' - 'Give me strength.'

"I guess I'm more of a why-wolf."

'But what is the universe for?'

'Hamlet'

reincarnated worm...

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

God Sneezes Out Creation

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

"Talking to your own reflection? Even your imagination is pathetic."

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

Science Museum. Why are you skeptical about the things scientists say? Because they claim the universe is expanding but when I visited my childhood hometown, everything was smaller.

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

The Origins of Everything

"Wait, am I hear for you or are you here for me?"

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

Do you ever wish you lived in a different era, Randy? It's safer to keep me where I am. Injecting my advanced virility into more primitive eras could have disastrous effects on the timeline. Well

"If the stars should appear one night in a thousand years, how would men believe and adore, and preserve for many generations the remembrance of the city of God which had been shown! … Emerson" "Good boy!"

"Life: play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, first love, brief happiness, breakup, regret, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, play, work, play, w

Dreams I have had...

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

Psychologist's receptionist to man: 'I'm afraid I cancelled your appointment - the doctor has decided you don't exist.'

"'Procreate'! I've climbed all this way to hear that the meaning of life is 'procreate'?!"

'The meaning of life? sorry, I can only answer 'true or false' questions.'

Warning: Metaphors for impending doom next 5 miles.

Whiskers realized he'd grown tired of the rat race.

"It's scary that humans are our benchmark for intelligent life in the universe."

"I've been supporting life for billions of years! You'd think they'd be supporting themselves by now!"

Book of Life, Answers in Back.

"Shall we put it in play?"

'If a man talks in the forest and there's no one around to hear him, is he still wrong?' 'He is a man, isn't he?'

Flea Philosophy.

I think therefore I am.

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"