Industrial Storyteller Gifts

Curate tells two miners that he hopes to see them on Sunday. They reply that he is welcome to come fighting with them if he likes.

How coal creates jobs: Appalachian Black Lung Clinic - Now hiring

I have an idea - Let's sit around the campfire and watch scary movies on our iPads!

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"So, you want to work at our firm, Eh?"

"While we're on the subject of earnings, does anyone have a clever metaphor using the word, 'toilet'?"

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

"He'll never win this negotiation. He's saddled with numbers...but we have anecdotes."

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

'Business is booming.' - at Uncle Bert's Explosives

'The stuka brought you.'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

Of course, we have to begin with certain assumptions. Let's assume I'm right and you're wrong.

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"Hang on! - we've possibly go another couple of films left in here!!"

"A homeless person ate my homework."

Mother changing the words to 'this little piggy' to be more healthy

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

Wall of Office Memories

"Start with a Spanish doubloon. Those are always good."

"Now the board will hear from Todd from Accounting with his free verse composition 'My Mistress, Brash and Beguiling – the Third Quarter Numbers.'"

Men dancing

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

'Well, they're just like your mom's cookies if your mom is a 35 ton, multi-unit dough extruder.'

'My office is always open to you Charles, at least until maintenance repairs the door lock.'

'Your resume is certainly impressive, Mr. Simmons, but do you have any on the job experience?'

Confident Business Team - We Know We Can

'Who else have I written for? Ridge Park Avenue, 7th Street, Elm Road, Thornwood Drive...'

Crafty Beer: "I'm making a scrapbook of when you were still fermenting."

"This X-Ray proves conclusively that you don't have a book in you."