Independent Work Gifts

'Thank you for the job offer, sir, but I'd hate to give up being an independent contractor.'

"The little engine that could... after taking advantage of family connections, a trust fund, working two years for free as an intern, and finally getting hired as an independent contractor."

Pony express. Pony express yourself. Pony express yourself so much he left.

Cellphone Islands

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

"I'm leaving. It's just way too much collaborating."

'What about you...you've been living here thirty years too?'

"Your mother and I think it's time you got a place of your own. We'd like a little time alone before we die."

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

"If I've got to work for a tyrant . . . I may as well work for myself."

'She knew we'd try to talk her-out of it.'

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

'I don't actually work for you. I'm a consultant.'

Ethanol and foreign oil.

Man on left - 'What do you call a public servant who spends half their time doing private work?' Man on right - 'An MP?'

"Lost most of my sight, hearing, teeth and hair. Thank God I still god my driver license."

The Real American Dream

Self-employed.

"You have to let me make my own mistakes."

And so Bob's folks sent him off into the world. But not before running a few last tests, just to be sure he could handle it.

"To heck with a husband... just help me find a dependable electrician."

"First buttons, then zippers, now we learn to tie our shoes. Is mom trying to tell us something?"

"Honey who needs a man when you've got... Rhythm!"

'I want to go out of town so that I can become a fully independent person, but near enough so that I can bring my laundry home.'

'I find the best way to get them to grow up is to buy them a 1-way ticket to Europe, and let them work their way back.'

"I work well independently. I usually correct all the problems I create."

"And since when does being twenty-five and married and living in Dallas excuse you from a family meeting?"

"Living underground is not what it used to be."