Self-employment Enthusiast Gifts

Home Business - Business Cards.

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

"It raises trust issues, Mr. Kranse, when your very first question is 'what's the catch?'."

'Nothing like being your own boss, huh?'

Resume Dumpers

"There's another one of those blokes that work from home."

"If I've got to work for a tyrant . . . I may as well work for myself."

'This home based business is easy to set up. Everyone knows that women are better at multitasking.'

'I don't actually work for you. I'm a consultant.'

The lap dog, I can work around. The laptop cat, not so much.

"Your former employer said you demonstrated a remarkable amount of 'get up and go'...especially when you were fired."

"I know you used to be our paperboy. That's why when you leave, you'll find your resume on the roof."

The Daily Commute

People who work-from-home, annual get together.

The Real American Dream

Self-employed.

"I'm a soul trader."

"We got him through a firm of headhunters"

'The candidate must be decisive and independently minded.' - 'Would I describe myself as 'decisive and independently minded'?' - 'Would you describe me as 'decisive and independently minded'?'

'I see you worked here seven years ago. Don't you have a better reference than that?'

"That was a good interview. Do you have any other questions about this company?"

'I received matching offers.'

'Somehow it just doesn't seem worth it for a one man business.'

Man types with beer on his computer.

'I do wish you'd use the study when you work from home.'

"I told you they had a tough interview process here."

"Maybe we apply as a group....crowdsourcing employment."

'How much for you to do my tax return?'

'I'd love to have whatever job you have left.'

'All these stupid forms! -- You self-employed guys make me sick!'

Very well, Mr Potter. I blinked first. You're hired.

'This startup is going to cost me a ton.'

"That's not all I do. Actually I'm a psychological counselor- gymnast-motivational speaker-relaxation therapist-sex worker."

'Who said honesty is the best policy?'

There's always one idiot at the staff Christmas party who goes too far. If you work for yourself, that would be you.