Inclusive Storyteller Pillows

"Which should we go see: the straight romantic comedy where the heroine's best friend is a gay man, or the gay romantic comedy where the hero's best friend is a straight woman?"

Friends

'It's a book about gays.'

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

Rainbow Quartet

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

Creativity

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"So no bases are uncovered, Sister Ann gives the sermon to the deaf and Brother Brooks blogs it."

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

"A homeless person ate my homework."

Mother changing the words to 'this little piggy' to be more healthy

"Start with a Spanish doubloon. Those are always good."

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

The new boy was teased for being different.

Sammi and her 'partner' decide to have their child baptized at a Suuuuper-inclusive church

'Have you ever thought about doing a children's book?'

'Who else have I written for? Ridge Park Avenue, 7th Street, Elm Road, Thornwood Drive...'

Crafty Beer: "I'm making a scrapbook of when you were still fermenting."

"Marlowe filled the crooked gumshoe full of lead. He watched the smoke from his .38 coil in the air as he… mommy’s behind me, isn’t she?"

"This X-Ray proves conclusively that you don't have a book in you."

'Go right on in, Helen. By the way, be sure to read tomorrow's newspaper - I understand your grandson has drawn a cartoon in your honor.'

"We used your unsold copies to build a tree, but it's not the same."

'It's a reinterpretation of the 'Christmas Carol'...but with a 'Vampire vs Werewolf' contemporary take on the story.'

"Since both of us believe in reincarnation, what if I pay you all the money I owe you in the next life?"