Empowered Storyteller Pillows

"It's the story of a smart and beautiful woman who faces the challenges of the future with the will of a warrior!"

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"Hang on! - we've possibly go another couple of films left in here!!"

"A homeless person ate my homework."

"Start with a Spanish doubloon. Those are always good."

Mother changing the words to 'this little piggy' to be more healthy

Mother Goose Spoilers

"Which should we go see: the straight romantic comedy where the heroine's best friend is a gay man, or the gay romantic comedy where the hero's best friend is a straight woman?"

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

'On the face of it, it sounds great that she left me her house, but it has gone stale and what Hansel and Gretel didn't eat the birds have had a go at.'

Crafty Beer: "I'm making a scrapbook of when you were still fermenting."

"This X-Ray proves conclusively that you don't have a book in you."

"Marlowe filled the crooked gumshoe full of lead. He watched the smoke from his .38 coil in the air as he… mommy’s behind me, isn’t she?"

"The family has spent all week crafting a beautiful service of words and pictures - far too sentimental to be of practical use."

'Who else have I written for? Ridge Park Avenue, 7th Street, Elm Road, Thornwood Drive...'

"Gosh, this reminds me of one of my favorite John Lennon lyrics: "Life is what happens to you while you're making other quarterly sales plans."

'Go right on in, Helen. By the way, be sure to read tomorrow's newspaper - I understand your grandson has drawn a cartoon in your honor.'

'Have you ever thought about doing a children's book?'

"I had half a date last weekend."

"We used your unsold copies to build a tree, but it's not the same."

'Thank you for your submission. If we're interested, we'll be in touch.'

Women Possibilities