Incentive Explorer Pillows

"You've been vital to our great year. Your bonus is whatever you can carry out by midnight."

Carrot VS Stick

Continuing education.

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

Paranormal A-Z...

"This is a test. This is only a test. IF this had been the real world it'd be your job you'd be fighting for, not a letter of the alphabet."

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'

'Congratulations, Yomp - we're giving you a bigger carrot!'

'My name is Jeremy and I approved this message.'

"Carrots just didn't get me going anymore, so I switched to chocolate instead..."

'It's not for homework. It's for traction.'

"Call me!"

"We'll see how it goes. It's Santa's first year with the genetically modified deer."

"You know, I'm really more the 'humanities' type."

'I was working on developing anti-matter under laboratory conditions, but I couldn't find anything to keep it in.'

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

December 26 - Vegas, office (post) Christmas party.

Performance Management: "We decided to get rid of the stick and just use the carrots."

'We hoped you'd respond more enthusiastically to our incentive program.'

'Now we'll have to explain it to the press. Remember - keep it superficial.'

Chemistry Improv Theater

"You want proof? There's your proof."

End school zone. Start unschool zone.

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

"Whoa, whoa – for all I know you contaminated the sample."

Carrots on sticks wardrobe.

'Just because the alignment of the system wasn't maintained during rapid sample exchange, it's no threat to your manhood.'

Exam Room.

"I'm looking for a book on how to raise kids easily, but I can't seem to find it anywhere..."

"I attempted Greek Math and stuck out like a Thor sum."

Board? Weed a book.

"If it makes any difference, it's a remarkable piece of plagiarism."

Finish your spinach and claim a free laptop!