Impersonal Language Expert Gifts

"Use impersonal language, or they'll ask us to take responsibility!"

Campaign for Plain English

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

WTF?

7 More Dwarfs

'How do you stop a fish from smelling?'

Actually, Mama was her third word. Buy Now were her first two.

'It says here you can talk trash in five languages.'

New Curriculum Timetable - All in Cantonese.

'Cosa vuol significare 'Spaghetti Western'?'

"Tip my boy."

God sends a text message: 'OMME!'

"He spent all morning trying to teach me my own name."

'Yes, a winky face is correct... But in ancient times, the semicolon was actually used to separate archaic written devices known as 'complete sentences.''

'Warspeak department' making up new military terminology.

"I know you're angry when you cross your arms."

Communikations Semminar.

"It's just a dinner table conversation. Must you refer to it as 'Talking Off-line'."

'I picked up my Latin from watching Roadrunner cartoons.'

Grim Reaper enters classroom where he teaches dead languages.

'When I ask what our inventory is 'What ever' is not an acceptable answer.'

A teacher introduces the new student to the class - he's an alien - 'Good evening class, this is Zork and he will be joining us until he learns enough English to conquer the Earth...'

Cliche Workshop, "Who wants to get the ball rolling?"

Teen Owl

'When a caller asks for me, I'd appreciate it if you'd stop saying 'who'?'

"Grammatically, the stickman should be behind the deer."

"Why study Latin? I guess so we'll know what Super Bowl game we're watching."

"Shankar, I needed someone to dot the 'i's' and cross the 't's' but that was before there was ChatGPT."

'Kid, I don't know if the plural is hippopotomi or hippopotamuses. I just say we've got one hippopotamus and then we've got another.'

UK Censors Office...

Everything starts with "e" and ends in "g".