Identity Philosopher T-Shirts

'Ethnic origin? Put me down as mixed race.'

Bar. You clones are all alike! Is that a compliment or not?

'You know how You created them male and female? -- Well, guess what.'

"I am very comfortable with my bovinity."

William Shakespeare Civil Court Judge. Well, you can legally change your name, but it won't make any real difference, Rose.

City Zoo. They call us "anteaters" --- talk about stereotyping!

"I hereby name thee 'Tissue Paperman'."

'If human body cells replace themselves every seven years, who am I NOW?'

Autobiographer holds up a mirror to his face.

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

Pinocchio's Second Realization

'Hi, my name is Bruce Wayne, but not THE Bruce Wayne!'

I've Always Wanted to Be Oppressed By Someone Who Looks Like Me

Plan to Split California into Six States Proposed....

"It's not face paint. I'm transitioning into a snow leopard."

'You have no idea how hard I've gotta work just to maintain my indie cred around here!'

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

"The answer you seek can be found in the syllabus."

"With this suit, I hereby establish dominion over my male identity."

"This tiny bald spot where your hairline used to be is so-o-o cute!"

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

Cherchez la femme

"Actually, Sally, my name isn't Mrs. Santa Claus... It's Barb. I'm not defined by my husband."

"You're starting to look like your old self again."

'I have this constant ringing in my ears. I think I have tinnitus.' - 'Does it sound like an 'eeeeeee' or a 'shhhhh'?' - 'It's like the murmer of a thousand forgotten souls quietly lamenting past sorrows.' - 'Hmmm. I don't have a checkbox for that, sadly.

Britain sinking and losing it's identity.

"Don't be fooled - that's Henrietta, cross-dressing again."

Secret Identity Theft.

'I am afraid, sir, that in the current economic climate, a picture is now only worth 500 words.'

"The best advice I can give you is: 'Be Yourself.'"

"I'm using my married name right now, but I'm keeping my maiden name on ice, just in case."

"Which one more says 'Cool Guy?'"

Time = $. Time > $.

"The floor is now open for discussion of what to name ou generation."

As Lucanus, a giant bug, awoke one morning from uneasy dreams, he found himself transformed into Franz Kafka.