Ice Skating Coach Gifts

The Skaters

'The ice is quite thin this evening.'

'Could you turn me around the other way?'

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

Reach for the Star.

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Time Is Money

The trauma of losing.

Go! Means NOW!

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

Night of the Zombonies.

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

'She hasn't advanced to figure eights yet.'

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

A Hard Look At Hard Looks

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

Bears

Lemniskate

A married couple share the same pole vault.

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

Bringing Your Child To The Bicycle Race

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'