Ice Skating Coach Gifts

The Skaters

'The ice is quite thin this evening.'

'Could you turn me around the other way?'

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

Reach for the Star.

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Time Is Money

Night of the Zombonies.

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

Go! Means NOW!

The trauma of losing.

Back to school.

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

'She hasn't advanced to figure eights yet.'

Bears

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

I love your enthusiasm, girls, but we're not opening a can of whoop-ANYTHING.

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

A married couple share the same pole vault.

Bringing Your Child To The Bicycle Race

A Hard Look At Hard Looks

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'