Hurricane Preppers Pillows

New Orleans awaits the next Hurricane.

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

Natural Disasters

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

A sun opens its mouth to eat a burning Earth

Zombie Problems

Cheer up-things aren't so bad.....

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

The End is Nigh

S.O.S. vaccine

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'Relax. This is only a test.'

Holiday Gifts 2020

'I keep them around for unruly octopi, or giant radioactive spiders... you know, just in case.'

Disasters

"My next book? It will probably be about rising up and crushing humanity."

'You've got swine flu and I think it's begun to mutate.'

Trick or Treatment.

'It's the worst I've seen in this area. Lots of chicken pox going around.'

'Have you filed an environmental impact statement for this flood?'

Fire Assembly Point

'The tropical tax haven where he offshored his business was just hit by a tsunami.'

"As you can see, hands are about to hit peak dryness, so we're predicting record lotion sales for next quarter."

Hazmat suit

In case of fire call yourself.

Goldfish Insurance: " We must insure against a deluge of BIBLICAL proportions. . ."

"The asteroid will hit in 2032, but I’m prepared!"

I survived end of the world after party.

'Of course the scientists have got this all wrong about climate change.'