Humorous Lifeguard Tales Gifts

'How long have you been a life-guard Mister?'

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

'No swimming. No breathing.'

"Ooooh, I bet that feels nice."

Baby on board.

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

Bathing-men attend to women on the french coast

Man is caught swimming on an inflable float in a moat by the knights.

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

Swimming Prankster

"We first met on the beach. He was a lifeguard and I was a poor swimmer."

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

'This seashell does not sound like the ocean... It sounds like someone yelling 'Look out!''

"We're here to recharge our batteries."

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Driving on the Beach - Lifeguard on a hydraulic lift.

Saved...life is good!

'I don't think that this whale is beached.'

S.P.F. 1,000

'You don't think you're just a tad overprotective?'

Lifesaver!

Jesus sighted walking off Malibu

'Relax, dude - I got your back.'

Safety Barriers

"I said, 'I'm not on duty! I just came back to get my flip-flops.'"

I told you not to swim out to far

'Don't be surprised if he throws that life preserver at you. I got him at a rescue shelter.'

The grim reaper racing a lifeboat to reach a drowning man

Fishy tail.

Shark tower surveillance camera.

"From downtown...the shark scores!"

"We've got a problem."

Resusci Annie takes a well-earned vacation.

Haywatch