Humorists Who Love Economy Jokes Pillows

'I just got a profit warning from my blood circulation!'

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

'Nonsense, Harry, it's my treat. I'm filing for bankruptcy tomorrow.'

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

Trickledown economics

Office of economic forecasting.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'We buy and sell them.'

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

A Double-Dip Recession with Sprinkles

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

'Consumer confidence is up.. in the 'Money in the mattress' sector.'

Inflating assets to get a loan. Too poor to pay taxes

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

First Market Decline

Government Handouts.

Thanks to his stocks, Bob now lives in the middle of a great green garden outside the crowded city.

Bad case of credit crunch, I'm afraid, so we'll have to slowly introduce you to a diet of cash.

Leprechaun finds EU bail out at the end of a rainbow.

"Since it cost as much as our house, can we take out a mortgage instead of a loan?"

Sign - 'Warning: Government Spending Objectives Are Larger Than They Actually Appear.'

"These days, many people can only afford to drink from home."