Fans Of Economic Humor Pillows

Just think of us as the control group for the affluent society.

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

'This financial report is frightening. Who wrote it, Stephen King?"

"While we're on the subject of earnings, does anyone have a clever metaphor using the word, 'toilet'?"

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

'Nonsense, Harry, it's my treat. I'm filing for bankruptcy tomorrow.'

Trickledown economics

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

"Good to see they're trying to keep the high street vibe."

Office of economic forecasting.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

'Well, son... I've made my first million by selling my unpaid bills to the paper-recycling guy!'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

'We buy and sell them.'

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

First Market Decline

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

We've been pre-approved by the credit card company to give them a loan.

'Consumer confidence is up.. in the 'Money in the mattress' sector.'

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

Inflating assets to get a loan. Too poor to pay taxes

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

Government Handouts.

'He's known for his pessimistic prognostications on the stock market.'

Thanks to his stocks, Bob now lives in the middle of a great green garden outside the crowded city.

'Sorry about the mess -- I've been slashing the Federal budget.'

"Since it cost as much as our house, can we take out a mortgage instead of a loan?"

Leprechaun finds EU bail out at the end of a rainbow.