Humorist With A Divine Twist Pillows

'And look what happened when I turn the tablet sideways - the text swivels the right way up.'

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

"We only got six days of funding."

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"Surgery up here is free!"

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"All we have left is standing room only."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

The Adventures of God

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

A surprise in heaven

'We've re-branded.'

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

Divine Desk Bins

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

"You are running low on cloud storage space. Please upgrade your account to continue."

"This Adam and Eve thing -- Is there a warranty?"