Humorist Of Progress Gifts

"If I get this phone completed, fire will follow."

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

They're Not Just That Into It

UK/US Free Trade Deal

No-Work Orange

Trump! The Musical

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"It was a lot more satisfying before 'catch and release.'"

It isn't widely known that Michelangelo was the first in a long line of cartoonists to buck the family tradition.

"The regular Fox news commentator was canned for being too soft on Iran. I'm Dick Cheney."

I've Always Wanted to Be Oppressed By Someone Who Looks Like Me

'He's downgrading the credit agencies.'

"Right here's fine."

What's an Imax cave?

The discovery of asparagus.

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

'On second thought, let's try it the other way around... My head on a lion's body.'

'Poll results are in...90% of Americans can't spell Schwarzenneger.'

The Uber Ride of Paul Revere

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

This side is the gag reel.

Spot the Difference - God/Uncle Sam

The Fall of Gnome

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

"When I said make it RIGHT, I meant correctly."

'We need to have a shake-up!'

'We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal, except for Hancock... who smells bad...'

'Does this thing get channel four.'

Short-lived Neanderthal Games: Slap The Sleeping Dinosaur

Bible Bloopers