Construction Humorist Gifts

"Risk! What do you mean, risk?"

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.

Ig-glue.

Dave, determined to go green by using only solar powered tools, will hereafter check weather reports before making bids.

Caution: You are entering a hard hat area

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

"No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants."

Even the micro manager, Jan reasons it won't hurt to get hers hands a little 'dirtier' and help out with a load or two...'

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

'My analysis indicates the need for an asbestos-ectomy, electrical-graphs and a plumbing-bypass.'

"That's quite a hole. Did ya dig 'er by hand?"

"I think we can agree that the bridge collapsing is not a good thing."

"Is this your first bricklaying job, Kevin...?"

'He thinks we're watering down the cement.'

Safety - Stretching Exercises.

A man's whole body is twisted after using a power drill.

Civil engineers' soap on a roap.

'Useful Drywall Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Drywall Screws.'

'I know I said you are using the wrong mortar, but!...'

'Remind me to tell the crane driver to bring a flask tomorrow.'

'Have you noticed how the building inspector always arrives around lunch time?'

Woodpecker wearing hard hat.

'Big deal! -- anybody can build a prefab!'

'That's gonna be a big job, boss.'

Brickies bum.

The team captain regretted asking Dave the builder to make a wall.

"When I grow up, I want to be a builder."

Private work adjustments

"Any experience other than watching Bob the Builder with your kids."

"Eere Bert, I've got an itch just below the shoulder blade."

"It's the tomb of the unknown cowboy builder."

Hygienic construction

Delay in construction works

Worker takes Boss out in a wheelbarrow

SPF 1000, the Sun Block preferred by 9 out of 10 vampires who work on road crews.